Discouragement

How many times have we as lupus patients been discouraged with something regarding our illness? We are discourageddiscouraged when we don’t feel well. We are discouraged when we can’t do what we want. We are discouraged when we think our medicines don’t work. We are discouraged when we thing our doctor isn’t listening to us, or won’t give us the medication we want. We are discouraged because there isn’t a medication that works well for us. We are discouraged because no one understands how we feel, what we are going through, or why we feel the way we do. Sometimes I think we are discouraged because it’s a normal feeling for us and we have felt that way for so long that we don’t know any other way to feel. Being discouraged has become a way of life for us. If that’s true, then how do we get out of being discouraged and find something that makes us feel other emotions; something that allows us to see there is good in our life even if we live with lupus.

I was always told, and know this to be true, when you are struggling or feeling down, help another person. I get to do this quite often. I can be having an incredibly bad day then the phone rings. On the other end is a lupus patient who really needs someone to listen. After I hang up I feel so much better. I used to wonder why this occurs and then I realized that my problems were small in light of what the other patient is going through. That’s often the case with life.

When I was in high school there was a writing that was done into a wall hanging; writing I read every morning. It gave me some of the best advice and guidance. I still read it today. It’s called Desiderata. You can find it on the internet.

Some of the very wise advice it provides is:

  • If you compare yourself with others you may become bitter and vain for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself
  • Be yourself
  • Many fears are bone of fatigue and loneliness
  • With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams it’s still a beautiful world

Desiderata offers so much more wisdom. These are just a few that I chose to offer here. Of all of these I believe the first and last speak the loudest.

If we sit and compare ourselves to others, even to the person we were before our diagnosis; it serves no purpose other than to make us unhappy. We should learn to be ourselves and love ourselves. The last one, for me says, whatever we are going through is temporary. Look at the world. It is still beautiful.

 

© The Lupus Support Network, Inc. and Wanda M. Argersinger

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